Archive for the ‘Ministry’ Category

Religion, an Overview

Wednesday, October 17th, 2018

Introduction

I am going to post some really general information on religions from a more academic perspective. Keep in mind, it has been quite a few years (a little more than a decade) since I have really studied religion and related topics, so I will try to keep this pretty general. I will also pull ideas from my previous posts on the topic of religion too, as well as some of my other related unpublished works.

I am writing this first, because I have wanted to write this post for a very, very, very long time, and second, as a precursor to my post talking about Alien Conspiracies? (Oct 2018). Why would I talk about religion as a precursor to a post about Alien Conspiracies? Well, I guess you will have to see how I tie it all together when you read that post! =) =P

I. The Origins of Superstition, Religion, and Human Morality

A. Superstitions and Religions as Evolutionary Adaptations

1. Evolutionary Adaptation

Superstitions, religions, and myths developed as an evolutionary adaptation after Humanity evolved from more of a ‘reptilian’ brain (reactive) species to a ‘moral animal‘ brain (proactive) species with increased:

  • brain size and capacity
  • intelligence
  • creativity, curiosity, and ability to innovate.

More specifically, because of those intellectual increases, superstitions, religions, and myths developed as a coping strategy to help Humanity, especially in our earliest evolutionary moments, to compensate for the increased awareness of our:

  • self-awareness
  • ignorance
  • agency
  • mortality.

Superstitions and religions, as human constructs, take our collective and individual ignorances and fears, and personifying and labeling them through imaginary anthropomorphic entities such as:

  • supernatural (witches, dryads, faerie, leprechauns, vampires, ghouls, ghosts, werewolves)
  • divine (Yahweh, God, Allah, Osiris, Dionysus, Loki, Great Sky Spirit, The Green Man, Ahura Mazda, Astarte, Shiva)

…and doing so as a coping method which allows us to:

  • rationalize or explain things we did not understand
  • alleviate pains and fears due to our ignorances and general suffering

2. Coping Strategy

For millennia (even today), partaking of one can be a powerful coping strategy that has been used to attempt to:

  • help make ourselves feel like we can make better sense of things, especially bad things that happen to us or our communities
  • or to be able to lay blame for our misfortune, bad luck, and despair on something with a concrete label

…instead of just saying “I don’t know.” or “That’s just life.” and being OK with that. It is easier to cope with problems and fears when we believe that something that has an identifiable label (spirits, gods, karma, witches, pixies) is responsible, than it is to cope with something that does not, such as when we say “We just do not know why or how.”.

Consider the following examples:

Example 1 – Sickness: A person who is very sick and goes from healer to healer who cannot tell them concretely: what is wrong nor provide any real help, nor tell them what the name is for their disease or how to fix it, but yet they are still suffering.

It is easier to hear “You have offended The Spirit of the Great Willow!” and to work towards fixing that, than to hear “We do not know and there is nothing we can do.“, and to just continue to wallow in pain and depression with nothing to do about it.

Example 2- Accidental Death: A woman’s young child dies after falling from a tree, and the mother, wailing in anguish, wants to know “Why, why has this happened to her baby!!”.

It is easier to hear “It was the work that witch who lives at the end of the village!” and to work towards fixing that, rather than to be told that “Accidents just happen. It is tragic, but there is nothing we can do.“.

Example 3 – Contagious Diseases: This phenomenon is especially powerful when a populace is similarly afflicted such as through earthquakes, floods. contagious diseases, poverty, and war. Not knowing what is wrong or why such bad things happen and why for an extended period of time can be very depressing and can have significant adverse biopsychosocial impacts.

Consider the following example:

A contagious disease rampages through a settlement killing 1/3 of the population (Bubonic plague anyone?) and people have no idea why or how, and they despair in the losses of their family and friends.

It is easier to hear “We are being punished because we have offended the gods!” and to work towards fixing that, than to hear again that “We do not know and there is nothing we can do.“.

3. Healing or Coping Through False Attribution

Once we have a label for that which plagues us such as divine wrath or you have angered the spirits of the forest or the pixies (whether rightly or wrongly attributed) then people can start to feel better and even come together in solace for being similarly afflicted, and even attempt to solve the problem (appease the Willow Spirit or to burn the witch or to increase sacrifices to the gods or to leave out food and gifts for the pixies), which increases in-group loyalty and cohesion instead of suffering further from panic, violence, or riots from not knowing what is wrong or why. Such false attribution may help to collectively alleviate those external stressors upon an individual or community as well as the associated negative biopsychosocial effects.

Superstitions and Religions, especially the more ancient formations, try to fill the role of providing labels for that which ails us and to make us feel better about our ignorance by providing a level of ‘healing (or coping) through attribution‘ (whether correctly or incorrectly attributed) as illustrated in the above examples. Healing (or coping) through false attribution can be useful for societal cohesion due to the extreme level of ignorance, anxiety, and fears, especially among of the oldest human civilizations.

4. The Perimeter of Humanity’s Ignorance

The Notorious NdT (Neil deGrasse Tyson) gave an amazing presentation at Beyond Belief: Science, Religion, Reason, and Survival in 2006 whose title is “The Perimeter of Ignorance“. This presentation was powerful and enlightening. He goes over example after example of what happens with the most brilliant people throughout history (such as Ptolemy and Isaac Newton) reach the limits of their ability to explain something – they say it must be due to magic or the hand of the divine. Strangely, fifty to a hundred years or more passes and then we are able to explain it, therefore is NOT the divine or magic, and so the cycle continues. This cycle shows that whatever it was that we could not explain was NEVER a supernatural or divine entity (or magic), but the just a temporal encounter with the Perimeter of Humanity’s Ignorance.

This phenomenon is also referred to as the God of the Gaps – where Humanity fills in the holes of our ignorance with God(s) or magic as the obvious explanation – as if like saying ‘It was God!’ was a universal existential putty to fill in the holes of our ignorance, to magically explain the things we cannot currently explain. The next question to ask those who would invoke such a fallacious answer would be “Which god?” since Humanity has have so many to choose from (over 5,000): Yahweh, God, The Green Man, The Goddess, Osiris, Zeus, Thor, Ahura Mazda, Shiva, Astarte, Inanna, Bhaal, etc.

B. Human Morality as an Evolutionary Adaptation

1. Humanity’s Social Evolution and Dominance

Let us first take a look at human social evolution and our rise to dominate this planet to begin this conversation. Humanity (homo sapiens) have existed for approximately 400,000 years or more (depending on which research you look at). And, during that time, especially prior to the last 10,000 years or so at the very beginning of the Neolithic Revolution, Humanity has not only survived our hominin kin (homo neanderthalensis, homo erectus, homo denisovans, etc…), but have out competed them all due to a few reasons. One is our technological advantage through developing bows about 80,000 years ago, prior to our great migration out of Africa 60,000-70,000 years ago. But, perhaps the most important one which we will concentrate on here, would be our social psychology as it has evolved through our species living the majority of our existence within nomadic hunter-gatherer tribes.

In order to survive and thrive within difficult living environments, most of which was within long and dry glacial periods, Humanity had to evolve a social psychology that allowed their tribe to work together and to maintain peace or they would perish to predators, starvation, or intratribal and intertribal violence. As a result, Humanity evolved a social psychology (morality) which was based on egalitarianism, cooperation, and sharing which kept the peace and allowed the people within their tribe (and with other tribes) to cooperate to not just survive harsh environmental conditions and out compete our hominin brethren, but to thrive and eventually dominate the planet.

Here are two contemporary examples of such techniques used to help keep peace within some indigenous tribes today: Ubuntu and Reverse Dominance Hierarchies, both of which are used to keep the peace by pulling everyone to the middle.

  • Ubuntu is used when someone has done something wrong. The whole tribe will surround this person and say all of the good things about them and good things that this person has done in order for them to get them to remember and reclaim their better self, and to know that their tribe sees them and appreciates them. This helps to pull this temporarily misbehaving person back up to the middle to their better and cooperative self.
  • Reverse Dominance Hierarchy is where someone has been quite successful at something such as killing a large deer. The tribal members will then say to them that they are not that successful or that others have done so too, etc… so that they do not grow an ego, pulling them back down to the middle with the rest of the tribe.

2. Where Do Our Moral Values Come From Then?

Now, let’s talk about where humanity has obtained our core morality from. Let’s take into account the following 3 points:

  1. Modern religions are only several thousand years old (2,000 – 5,000+ years) while, as we established above, Humanity (homo sapiens) has existed for approximately 400,000 years or more.
  2. The core universal human morality is the same throughout the world – kindness, cooperation, sharing, and egalitarianism.
  3. All religions teach these universal values such as through “The Golden Rule” which is found in every single society, culture, and religion throughout human civilization and our history.

As we have established above, our values have evolved over hundreds of thousands of years before the invention of modern religion and, therefore, religion cannot be the progenitor of human morality. Not only that, but if such values transcend culture, religion, and geography and are found everywhere throughout Humanity, then it must be an evolutionary adaptation. It is really that simple. 

Why don’t modern religions embrace the fact that human morality is a fundamental evolutionary adaptation that transcends all religions, and is a trait that is visceral to Humanity, i.e. humans tend to be kind and cooperative (all things being equal)? Why do they keep pushing the line that “Our religion is best and has the absolute truth while all of the other religions do not!” or that “Humans are innately broken or sinful.”? What do they have to gain from this if they truly believe in a peaceful and united Humanity? If religions seriously wanted to create a peaceful and united Humanity, then they would truly embrace and show reverence for evolutionary origins of our values which would truly unite us all, because it transcends all boundaries such as race, tribe, gender, nation, religion, ethnicity, etc. 

The mind-blowing book The Inner Level: How More Equal Societies Reduce Stress, Restore Sanity and Improve Everyone’s Well-Being covers the biopsychosocial affects of economic inequality has this wonderful passage on Humanity’s evolutionary development of pro-social values which would presage modern religions:

It is often thought that values such as honesty, generosity and kindness were almost invented by, and remain dependent on, religion. But although religious convictions and teachings may help to sustain standards of kindness and generosity (despite sometimes also creating problems of intolerance), we can now see that prosocial characteristics were instilled in us during human prehistory by the evolutionary power of social selection in egalitarian societies. As anthropological accounts of recent hunter-gatherer societies suggest, the tendency to value unselfishness, generosity and kindness dates back into the distant mists of time. Although religious belief can add emphasis to these instincts, prosocial values are etched more deeply into our evolved psychology and are much older than any religious ideology that has arisen in the last few thousand years.

The Inner Level: How More Equal Societies Reduce Stress, Restore Sanity and Improve Everyone’s Well-Being (Pickett and Wilkinson, 2019)

3. What is the Core Value System to All Religions?

If you really look at global religions and compare them you will find that all religions are humanistic at their core, but steeped in the social, historical, political, mythological, and theological trappings of their formation. If we strip all of that excess stuff away, which is really only interesting from an academic, historical, theological, or philosophical standpoint, then what we will find is a stripped down form of Humanism – how to ethically treat each other and the environment.

What is exactly is Humanism? Here are some definitions for you:

Humanism
Humanism is a philosophical and ethical stance that emphasizes the value and agency of human beings, individually and collectively, and generally prefers critical thinking and evidence (rationalism and empiricism) over acceptance of dogma or superstition. (Wikipedia)
Humanism
Humanism is a progressive philosophy of life that, without theism or other supernatural beliefs, affirms our ability and responsibility to lead ethical lives of personal fulfillment that aspire to the greater good. (American Humanist)
Humanism
Humanism is a democratic and ethical life stance that affirms that human beings have the right and responsibility to give meaning and shape to their own lives. Humanism stands for the building of a more humane society through an ethics based on human and other natural values in a spirit of reason and free inquiry through human capabilities. Humanism is not theistic, and it does not accept supernatural views of reality. (International Humanist and Ethical Union)
Humanism
Humanism is a broad category of ethical, metaphysical, epistemological and political philosophies in which human interests, values and dignity predominate. It has an ultimate faith in humankind, believes that human beings possess the power or potentiality of solving their own problems, through reliance primarily upon reason and scientific method applied with courage and vision. (Philosophy Basics)

In essence, Humanism looks to and has faith in Humanity, science, knowledge, ethics, and its institutions (true attribution) for the answers to ALL of life’s problems. It does not recognize nor seek magical, supernatural, or divine answers (false attribution).

As pointed out above, when Humanity has exclaimed it was the gods or the supernatural, that doing so was merely a tacit admission of our ignorance paired with a powerful desire for a more satisfying label to assuage our peace of mind until the real answers are found… by science. Being able to be OK with saying that we do not know or do not understand without having to invoke the Gods of the Gap will bring Humanity closer together for superstition, religion, and ignorance will no longer divide us. Humanity and our interdependent and interconnected place within the universe (and not ignorance and fear) will be religion’s central focus. This will allow Humanity, as a collective whole, to really look at the solutions to the world’s problems, to help us all to progress together, sharing in our collective efforts and brilliance, lifting us ALL up and not just the a chosen few, or just your limited definition of tribe.

Those religions that have Humanism as the core of their philosophical and theological core are the religions that will really help humanity forward and will be part of the solution. If only they were as organized, driven, and as politically active in the public sphere as conservative religions were. You can check my post The Tao of Entropy and Syntropy within Human Social Systems as to why this is the universal case.

What you will find as you take into consideration conservative religion’s social dominance is that pretty much NO conservative religions are humanistic at their core because their fear based beliefs and dogmas are more are important to them and is the primary focus of their work regardless of the cost to Humanity and the Natural World. For them to become part of the global solution by embracing a humanistic theology would require them to no longer be conservative because they would need to question and completely reject what they have been taught, to learn about the world at large, and to knowingly and willingly chose a Humanistic belief system which would demand that they love and show compassion for those that they currently revile and hate. It would require, in no small terms, a global theological revolution.

When Humanity and the Natural World becomes our primary philosophical, ethical, and religious concern then the dehumanization of our fellow humans will be a crime of the highest order, a literal Crime Against Humanity. If you will remember, the many horrors committed in the history of the world (racism, sexism, slavery, genocide, brutality, war, exploitation) are a result of this dehumanization. For this reason alone, having Humanity to shift towards humanistic beliefs is an imperative to save us from the extinction due to our many divisions. Until all religions world-wide embrace the humanistic cores to their theology they will continue to be a plague upon Humanity and the Natural World.

4. Religion’s Usurpation of Morality

I have a much larger piece of writing that will talk about how it ALL has gone wrong (not just religion), so I will just touch on this topic to give you something to think about. 

Now, do religions preach these seemingly universal values? Yes, they typically do. Do most like to claim that they are the ultimate arbiter of morality because their supernatural entities in the sky or beneath the earth (or wherever) empower them to claim as such? Sure they do. Religion has harmfully usurped the truth of our collective, universal, and evolutionary forged morality as a method of controlling their flocks to keep them chained to their sect, to keep the money rolling through fear, tribalism, and competition. This is not solely an intrinsic fault of religion itself, since religions and other social systems will merely reflect the dominant social, economic, and political values of their time (in this case the values of scarcity, competition, separation, and sociopathy; in other words the values of monetary systems and capitalism) which is a whole different conversation, but it is an important concept to understand.

Humanity’s core social psychology was powerfully forged within a nomadic hunter-gatherer world based on egalitarianism, cooperation, and sharing within relative resource abundance, which is devastatingly at odds with adapting to a modern settled way of life based on classism, competition, and exploitation within a world of significantly resource scarcity and violence. This reality forms the virulent tempest within which Humanity has come to relate to each other and the natural world resulting in the horrors of poverty, war, cruelty, suffering, and the total environmental devastation that we see today.  

II. Historical Evolution of Superstition and Religion

Introduction

As you go forward through time from Humanity’s meager beginnings, our collective superstitions have evolved into religions which have then evolved and proportionally expanded in scope based on:

  • expanding tribal population and scope
  • increasing understanding of the world
  • expanding fears and awareness of our ignorances
  • to meet societal, social, and cultural needs

See the main image at the top of this post for the Evolutionary Tree of Myth and Religion.

Historically, religions have formed, evolved, or sprouted into being through the three following very general historical types:

  • Small Population Formations – concentrating mostly on the highly localized natural world (earliest religions created – most of human history – older than about 10,000 – 12,000+ years)
  • Large Population Formations – tending towards polytheism (religions created in the middle of human history – last 8,000+ years or so)
  • Cosmopolitan Formations (post-Abrahamic Faiths) – concentrating on moral of philosophical values (newest religions or ethical philosophies created – last 200 years or so)

Indigenous religions (the oldest religions) all tend to be a form of spiritism or animism (Small Population Formations). Western and European religions (middle of recorded human history) tend to be polytheistic at their base (Large Population Formations), with the rise of monolatry as is found in the Abrahamic faiths (Judaism, Christianity, Islam, Mormon). The more contemporary (a)religious formations such as Unitarian Universalism, Humanism, Secularism, Atheism developed as Cosmopolitan Formations. Buddhism is rather unique historical religious development which formed during the Large Population Formation period, but has significant traits of of Cosmopolitan Formation.

A. Small Population Formations

When the Earth had its smallest human populations, during early hunter-gatherer societies and early tribalistic periods, religious formations start out being hyperlocalized – the spirit of a specific animal or that strange rock formation or that really large tree over there. Then, as their populations traveled or grew, and their understanding of the world increased, so did the scope of their localized spirits which shifted to spirits of a geographical site (forest, river, lake, rock formation, etc) or of the whole wolf pack. This formation covers most indigenous and nature based religions as well as most pre-agrarian religious practices.

spiritism (local)spirit of the rock of the tree, of the stream
spiritism (geographical)spirits of the lake, forest, hills, mountains

B. Large Population Formations

For religions created during later tribalistic periods there is a shift from geographical spirits to tribal gods (Canaanites), and then to a much larger cultural/national pantheons of gods (Egyptian, Greek, Roman, Hindu).

polytheism (tribal)gods unique to each tribe, or smaller group people which covers a small geographic area
polytheism (national)gods unique to each nation, culture, or peoples which covers a large geographical area
monolatry/monotheismA more recent and anomalous historical development – the belief that the one god, in spite of and over, all others

With expanding population centers later being defined by nation states and there being a significant increase in knowledge of the world through the advent of such disciplines as: history, ethics, arts, astronomy, physics, math, philosophy, etc:

  1. the scope of their gods expanded to be national instead of localized and tribal
  2. they essentially separated them from direct ties to the localized natural world to live in the skies (or other essentially unreachable place) so their divine entities are more generalized and available to a larger populace
  3. these new gods’ influence expanded to cover broad portfolios such as: war, love, fertility, plants, luck, etc instead of more localized features such as a tree or rock which might have similar very localized influence

C. Cosmopolitan Formations

With the largest populations present that Earth has ever seen and at the current height of Human knowledge, the more modern religious formations tend to concentrate on:

  • the philosophical and ethical foundations of religions, life, existence
  • less on the natural world in specific or whether there is or is not the divine
  • concentrating on ecological and humanitarian preservation and where humanity stands in the scheme of things – tending towards a sort of a global eco-humanistic (a)religious view.
pantheismall is part of the divine – many paths, one truth
humanismhumanity is responsible for its own damnation or salvation
atheism/secularismthere is no real divine or supernatural, just existence

Here is a neat comic strip which illustrates this overall historical evolution of religions through the ages:

History of Religion
History of Religion

D. Historical Pattern of Religious Evolution

As you look at what I have written above especially in light of NdT‘s presentation, you will see a pattern here: the growth and evolution of religious formation evolves along with the:

  • growth of our population centers
  • growth of human knowledge (and inversely to our worldly ignorances)

At the height of our ignorance our religions focused on the immediate natural world which was not understood (disease, seasons, weather, life, death, personal accidents such as a broken leg). As our knowledge of the world grew then we traded in spirits for gods. Then we traded in gods for philosophies and eco-consciousnesses.

At the height of our ignorance we attributed almost everything to the spirits and supernatural immediately surrounding us, but eventually those walls of ignorance and false attribution are torn down due to experience, knowledge, truth, and science once we understood it. Once we understood how or why something happens then people no longer falsely attribute those occurrences to the supernatural or the divine, and then its explanation falls under the purview of science and fact. When that happens, then we are able to do something about it and science and innovation takes off to fully understand and then to solve that problem. At that moment, everything that is beyond our understanding and explanation is then again attributed to the supernatural or the divine. The cycle continues as we are forever encountering the perimeter of Humanity’s ignorance.

E. The “Mythologies” of Tomorrow?

If we pull back a little farther, there is something more we can learn from this historical cycle of humanity creating superstitions and religions over time to cope with our ignorances, our fears, and our suffering. The superstitions and “religions” that are used within any contemporary period fall of out of favor and are eventually cast aside to be replaced with something else (We are talking over hundreds of years or thousands of years.). All of the “religions” of today will eventually end up being studied as “mythologies” in the ephemeral World of Tomorrow.

Just as the Greeks and then the Romans thought their polytheistic religion was the ultimate truth, only to be replaced by Judaism and Christianity. Both of the former are now studied as yesterday’s mythologies. Eventually Christianity, Judaism, Hinduism, Buddhism, Islam, and all of the other religions of today will all be relegated to the dustbins of history and replaced by something else, which in turn will be replaced by something else, and so the cycle will continue until Humanity’s inevitable extinction. This is the relentless march of human history, and of our evolution and change. It not a matter of IF it will happen. It is a matter of when it will happen.

III. Issues with Conservative Religion, Superstition, and Mythology

Introduction

This section is going to be rather large so strap yourself in for we have a lot of background and leg work to setup the conversation. This will also contribute to our conversation on the evolution of religion and personal choice in religion, as well as the conversation for the last section of this post.

A. Psychological Factors in Religious Belief

Introduction

Below I am going to talk about a few things to get you thinking, I will cover a few technical topics in psychology which I will relate together at the end to make a few points. I will cover the following topics:

  1. Schrodinger’s Cat and Schrodinger’s Smilodon
  2. False Positives and False Negatives
  3. Pascal’s Wager
  4. Morale Psychology and Other Psychological Factors

I know! I know! Why is all of this sciencey stuff in a talk about religion. Dagnabbit, boy! Keep you science away from my religion! Just hang with me here, because I am actually going somewhere with this.=) I will pull all 4 of these together into one idea at the end.

1. Schrodinger’s Smilodon

Smilodon
Smilodon

Let’s talk about Schrodinger’s Smilodon! But first, in order to understand that, we need to talk about Schrodinger’s Cat! There was a scientist named Erwin Schrodinger that postulated a thought experiment that we call Schrodinger’s Cat which was useful for thinking about quantum superpositioning. This thought experiment basically states that if we have this box with a cat in it which also has a radioactive isotope and a poison in it, that we do not know if the cat is alive or dead until we open the box to check. In this case, before opening the box, the cat’s ‘state’ is both dead and alive (unknown) until we know for sure by opening the box.

For the examples below we will use something we will call Schrodinger’s Smilodon which is a smilodon – a large predatory prehistoric cat (@Wikipedia, @New Dinosaurs) – that is both there and not there (unknown state) potentially hunting in the bushes until the hunters check to know for sure, which would end up either good for the hunters (not there) or bad for the hunters (is there and hungry). =O

Got it so far? Schrodinger’s Smilodon – a smilodon with an unknown state (both there/not there) until the hunters know for sure.

2. False Positives and False Negatives

In psychology there is something referred to as a false negative and a false positive which shall relate directly to our Schrodinger’s Smilodon in the situations below where we will follow some prehistoric hunters who are hunting in a forest and hear a sound which gets them thinking it might be a smilodon hunting in the forest. This moment gives us our Schrodinger’s Smilodon because they do not know for sure if it is there.

a. False Negatives

A false negative means: a person falsely assumes something is NOT correct when it is, in fact, true which can be dangerous.

As an example: Our prehistoric hunters hear a sound in the bushes over there and they think it might be a hungry smilodon hunting them. This gives us Schrodinger’s Smilodon, because in that moment the smilodon is both there and not there (an unknown state)…  because the hunters do not know for sure.

In this case, the hunters do NOT assume that the sound they just heard was a hunting smilodon, when in fact it really was, which ends up with the hunters being smilodon lunch. =( That is a false negative. False negative = smilodon lunch.

b, False Positives

A false positive means: a person falsely assumes something is true when it is, in fact, NOT true which can also be dangerous, but generally less so, when applied in this context.

As an example: Our intrepid prehistoric hunters hear a sound in the bushes over there and they think it might be a smilodon hunting them in the forest. This gives us Schrodinger’s Smilodon, because, in that moment, the smilodon is both there and not there (an unknown state)… because the hunters do not know for sure.

In this case, the hunters DO assume that the sound they just heard was a hunting smilodon, so they end up taking defensive precautions allowing them to escape unharmed regardless of whether or not there was a smilodon there (there wasn’t). In either case, the hunters are safe because they assumed there was danger and then acted accordingly to protect themselves allowing them to live to hunt another day. False Positive = He who assumes there is a hunting smilodon in the bush lives to hunt another day!

c. Psychological Implications

As an evolutionary adaptation, assuming something is potentially dangerous (false positive), being risk averse (scaring more easily) as a defensive posture is safer than assuming something is not dangerous. Those early humans who developed this adaptation (a heightened sense of danger) allowed them to be safer and to survive longer because they preferred to assume that something was dangerous and taking the appropriate action to protect themselves resulting in the evolution of a more sensitive and easily triggered fight-or-flight response.

3. Pascal’s Wager

In this day and age, when we apply false positives to people’s choice or belief in religion this sets us up for something called Pascal’s Wager which says something like: It is safer to assume that God(s) exists and to be fearful and obedient (and potentially rewarded) than it is to not believe and not obedient (and hence potentially punished).

Pascal's Wager Result Matrix
Pascal’s Wager Result Matrix

See how that all came together? No? OK, so here is the line of logic:

  1. Those people who, when faced with a choice to believe that something is a threat or not, (Schrodinger’s Smilodon)
  2. … and have evolved have a higher sense of risk aversion, are more fearful, or more easily give in to fear will assume something is dangerous (false positive),
  3. … and therefore would develop the tendency to give in to religion or potentially even have the desire for religion for fear of divine reprisal (Pascal’s Wager).

Here is a simpler way to say it: Those who have an evolutionarily heightened sense of fear will tend to be religious.

4. Moral Psychology and Other Psychological Factors

Now, on to the last part of this section. In the previous sections I laid the groundwork to show you that those who are risk averse or fearful will tend to be religious. I am going to apply a few other areas of psychology here to take this a step further. Specifically, I am going to work with conservative psychology as seen through the lens of moral psychology and a few other relevant studies. I cover a quite a bit of the base concepts of moral psychology in my post titled Morality vs Religion (Apr 2015) which is where I will pull almost all of this section from. Please take the time to read that post to really prepare yourself for this section, because I will not explain these in detail here. I will quickly cover the parts that are pertinent which will focus on conservative psychology and religious belief.

So, on to moral psychology. From moral psychology, as talked about in my above post, conservatives score high on these three (of the 5) moral psychological factors:

  • In-Group Loyalty (Tribalism) – hold their tribe and members as more trustworthy and safe – others who are different and not a member of their tribe are probably not
  • Authority/Respect – respect and prefer their authority structures to a fault
  • Purity/Sanctity – believe in the infallibility of their authority and their own beliefs

From other contemporary studies they also tend to have the following psychological traits:

  • negativity bias – prefer negative things and see threats everywhere (false positives)
  • intolerance of ambiguity – prefer things to be clear-cut, black and white, easy to understand or accept; do not like cognitive dissonance

If we combine Pascal’s Wager with conservative’s intolerance for ambiguity as well as the moral psychological factors from above, you will find a person that will find significant comfort in religion, especially conservative religion, because it will:

  • be an authority which claims righteousness and infallibility (purity, authority),
  • tell them unequivocally what is right and wrong (authority, purity, intolerance of ambiguity),
  • brand minority (and other groups) a threat (negativity bias, loyalty, purity, intolerance of ambiguity)

… which pings all of their psychological factors and keeps them angry, fearful, motivated, blindly faithful, and… voting, especially during midterm elections. =O

As a part of this, they do not like to have to think or consider the implications of their beliefs or actions because that would bring about the horrors of cognitive dissonance and ambiguity as well as the potential that they may be wrong, which would challenge and violate their perception of purity and authority of the themselves, their authority (church), and tribe. Therefore, if they do not think about it, and blindly commit themselves to their beliefs and cause, regardless of the consequences, then they will not have the think about it nor face external consequences because of the purity of their authority which tells them right from wrong, who the enemies are, and which also promises righteousness and eternal reward.

B. Conservative Religion as a Force for Corruption and Regression in the World

Introduction

If we take into account the staggering implications of the previous section, you will see that fear is a powerful motivator due to not understanding the world, negativity bias, and a dislike for ambiguity within conservatives which keeps many in religion. Some stay even though they do not really believe, not that they would allow themselves to even ask that question, but are going through the motions because they are afraid of going to Hell, being cursed, or angering the spirits (Pascal’s Wager); and others because they love the surety and perceived purity of the of their church (authority) and henceforth themselves and their self-selected church which supports their self-selected beliefs. All doing so regardless of whether or not these divine or supernatural things actually exist or not. That is not something they would ever question, for they were told by their church that it was undeniably true and that they, or their family, or their people would be punished for not believing, or that they would burn for eternity. We also need to take into account social, cultural, and political reinforcement and enforcement of such beliefs which greatly adds to their perpetuation.

1. Divine Beliefs Conveniently Coincides with Personal Beliefs

Men tend to have the beliefs that suit their passions. Cruel men believe in a cruel God, and use their belief to excuse their cruelty. Only kindly men believe in a kindly God, and they would be kindly in any case.

Bertrand Russel (London Calling, 1947)

Religion can even be an even more powerful tool for evil in the world when a person can pick and choose the religion and denomination that conveniently supports their world views and desires. Christianity has over 5,000 mainstream denominations world-wide and throughout history ranging from the theological humanism found in Unitarian Universalism to the far right and hate-filled fringe such as the Westborough Baptists.

If you fear and hate racial and sexual minorities then there are denominations and religions for that. If you love the environment then there are denominations and religions for that too. Perhaps, the religion we chose to belong to reflects who we are as person. If a person chooses a hate-filled religion then that is who they are as a person and they just want justification and absolution for their desires and beliefs. If a person chooses a religion that supports humanity and the environment and is filled with compassion then, perhaps that is who they are as a person.

Keep in mind, I will not get into cultural, social, and religious indoctrination as well as the pernicious effects of monetary systems, but that is also something to keep in mind and makes this topic not as clear cut nor simple as I am making it out here for the purposes of this discussion.

Reza Aslan’s video talks about this: God doesn’t hate people.

2. Religion as a Tool for Removing Accountability

Because a person can find a religion to justify any sort of vile or beneficent world view, religion and the supernatural then also becomes the really easy method to justify evil actions, to absolve one of guilt, or to keep from having to take responsibility for one’s actions. A person can patently wash away their crimes by saying that the Devil or a witch made them do it, or that their god wanted them to do it, or that their god forgave them even for such heinous actions: as slavery, genocide, human sacrifice, murder, or raping children; and there is no way to disprove them or to negate their assertion short of the fictitious divine or supernatural figure showing up for tea to state otherwise – and we know that is NOT going to happen. Also, even if that did happen, this would still NOT make their heinous acts acceptable anyhow. This is something that is very predominant even in today’s supposedly enlightened world.

As much as some would like to look upon Christianity as something pure and exceptional, it has been used to justify slavery, genocide, war, murder, child-rape, and all sorts of other hate filled and horrific acts throughout its short existence in human history. I am not going to pick on only Christianity here, but most other religions, especially those that developed as Large Population Formations are guilty of this too.

You can see this with these more modern examples:

  • Donald Trump’s absolution of several divorces and infidelity by fundamentalist churches and his abhorrent attitudes towards refugees;
  • Mormons exiling their gay children to the streets;
  • Mormons and other religious sects marrying and raping children.
  • The Vatican covering up raging pedophilia within their ranks and summarily absolving them of guilt;
  • Religious parents beating and torturing their kids while using their religious text to validate that their cruelty is according to the divine laws;
  • Israel’s slaughter of Palestinians;
  • African Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) which is found in both their Christian, Jewish, and Islamic sects;
  • ISIS beheading children for listening to music.
  • Islamic stoning of women who are found without the escort of a relative, or people being beheaded for apostasy.

The list is bountiful even in today’s world where religion conveniently absolves those who are responsible for horrific acts from any guilt and even providing them a false sense of righteousness for their vile actions. Not only are they providing absolution for their crimes against Humanity, but such belief systems also demand that they do some of these horrific things, as well as provide a twisted rationale and a powerful reward for it too. The video below with Greta Christina goes over many of these horrors.

3. Dogma Over People and the Environment

To start this section off, I am going to paraphrase a quote by Voltaire here to hopefully put this into perspective:

Those who can convince your to Separate yourself from others, to forsake your own humanity, to believe that your dogma or beliefs are more important than Humanity can convince you to commit atrocities.

James O’Neill
If your religion makes you hate someone then you need a new religion.
If your religion makes you hate someone then you need a new religion.

With the above sections on psychology and looking at their results we can find that, especially within conservative religious circles, their dogma and beliefs are what are important no matter who is hurt in the process, for if they were to consider the real ramifications of their actions or to try taking responsibility for them then it would violate their moral psychological values and bring on dissonance and ambiguity which they cannot have, as well as result in challenging the purity of their authoritarian structures, their beliefs, as well as challenge their desire to NOT be eternally punished. To keep this from happening many blindly and zealously devote themselves to their religion which:

  • they hand-picked to support their hatreds and views
  • hands them views and enemies which conveniently aligns with their personal views
  • conveniently absolves them from guilt for the dehumanizing beliefs and actions against their fellow humans
  • even rewards them socially and eternally for their beliefs and actions

With a righteous hand they smite the unrighteous in their god’s name and, in doing so, they may be reviled by the nonbeliever, but they shall be granted heavenly and eternal rewards. Does this idea sound familiar? This is a very powerful motivation in not only in the Abrahamic faiths (Judaism, Christianity, Islam) but most other religions around the world too in one form or another. This process is very problematic and, if Humanity is going to truly progress and bring peace to the world, then we must find a way around it or to stop it from poisoning our world and people.

4. Conservative Religion as a Powerful Force for Dehumanization of Our Fellow Human Beings

It is easy to sway and manipulate an ignorant, fearful, and blindly following populace because they do not know any better and cannot hope for better because the religious classes control exactly what the masses can hope for and what they must do in order to be saved (or to have the divine light to shine upon them so their luck can change). This is a powerful force for the dehumanization of their fellow man. What horrors has humanity inflicted upon each other in the name of salvation because some words were written or spoken as an inspired form of social control or terrorism. Horrors such as:

  • slavery
  • poverty
  • war
  • witch trials
  • human sacrifice
  • genocide of indigenous populations
  • genocide of ethnic or religious minorities
  • police brutality
  • attacks on homosexual and transgendered peoples as well as other sexual minorities
  • female genital mutilation, circumcision

Here is this amazing video of Greta Christina titled Why are you Atheists so Angry from Skepticon 4 in 2011 which goes over the many reasons that atheists are so angry at religion, some of which I have stated above. In the link I have the video and have added a captioned transcript in case you would rather read it. However, perhaps the most powerful thing she states and which really resonates with me is: “Many Atheists are NOT angry because what has been done to themselves, but for what has happened to others. “. Watch it and check out what she is talking about and listen to her rather large list. This is a powerful video:

5. Conservative Religion Inhibits Innovation and Problem Solving

Because of the surety that conservative religion brings – as in: “All you need is the our set of scriptures because all answers are in there!?”, it has an affect of inhibiting innovation, critical thinking, and problem solving by saying they have the answer and it should not be questioned, and to question it is sacrilegious – even though religion does not have a real answer that actually solves anything.

“Don’t think! Pray and make offers to appease the divine. God will make everything work out. It is God’s will. The gods works in mysterious ways.” This mentality results with, as Neil deGrasse Tyson so aptly put it, revelation replacing investigation.

Consider these two powerful historical examples:

The Rise of Christianity Within the Ancient Roman Empire: Here is an agonizing set of historical examples for you to ponder. After the keys to the then polytheistic Roman Empire were handed over to the Roman Orthodox Catholic Church by Emperor Theodosius I:

  • Christianity slaughtered many Pagans and Christians (non-Roman Orthodox Christians) as well as burned their many heretical scrolls and books of knowledge. Not only did we lose much the the knowledge of the other Christian sects such as the Gnostics who were branded heretical by the literalist Roman Orthodox Church, but also…
  • The Library of Alexandria, much like Baghdad from below – was the greatest center of learning in its time, fell into disrepair and eventually burned down losing a great treasure trove of knowledge, history, science, and philosophy. Tragic!
  • The Temple of Serapis, the Library of Alexandria’s sister temple, which also held much of the knowledge of the known world, was attacked by Roman Orthodox Christian zealots during Christianity’s rise which resulted in the slaughter of the the priests and acolytes that were there, as well as the slaughter of influential female Pagan philosopher Hypatia, and then they burned down the temple and its large collection of the world’s knowledge. The amazing movie Agora from 2009 goes over this.

The Rise of Conservatism in Islam: Another painful example of this phenomenon is present towards the end of Neil deGrasse Tyson’s video from above. Start at about the 26 minute and 30 seconds mark where he talks about the amazing scientific advancements within Islam where Baghdad, which is in present day Iraq, was the intellectual center of the world prior to the rise and corruption of conservativism within Islam.

See what happened to scientific discovery and discourse following its conservative evolution. Islam had a 300 year period of amazing scientific and philosophical advancements and then, with the rise of the control of conservatism within Islam, that 300 year period with an explosion of knowledge and science came to a screeching halt, and it has never recovered from that. This is a powerful and sad example.

How much art, philosophy, history, and science have we lost from these two tragic examples of revelation replacing investigation? There are many, many more examples replete throughout history.

There are even too many numerous smaller examples to count throughout history. Even in more recent times and our supposedly scientifically advanced times we have people who are:

  • Creationists fighting to get rid of evolution in schools and replace it with creationism.
  • Climate Change Denialists denying and fighting against human caused climate change.
  • Your Earth Creationists believing the earth is only 6,000 years old.
  • Flat Earthers believing that the Earth is still flat.

6. Religion as a Form of Social Control

Throughout almost all of human history, church and state were essentially one entity, especially during early human history (i.e. shaman and tribe) and through the middle of recorded human history. It is even present now in the modern world (i.e. Saudi Arabia, Iran, Israel, and Rome). The ubiquity of religions’ tentacles which has infected every single facet of politics and society has established itself as a form of ultra-powerful and cross-class form of social and political control so that those in power (the 1%) can maintain their power by influencing the flow and bias of information and, more importantly, what the populace is willing to believe and do through the use fear for themselves, their families, their collective religious identities, and their nation which provides the genesis for the many vile ‘ism which infects our world: tribalism, nationalism, sexism, racism, and other divisive horrors.

By ensuring that the religious classes were the gatekeepers to knowledge, morality, power, and divine judgement they enshrined themselves as a privileged and rich ruling class while others suffered in ignorance and poverty (Check out the Prosperity Gospel). They even fought, cast down, and even murdered the innocent that dared to challenge their power and self-proclaimed sanctity to ensure that the masses were kept ignorant and poor. This also allowed to them to use their sermons and religious and political influence to maintain their power through the control and bias of information flow since they (along with the rich) were the only real educated populations, as well as self-declaring themselves as having been the chosen and privileged speakers for the divine whose wrath the people feared and whose favor they desperately desired for themselves and their families who were suffering.

Keeping people poor, fearful, and ignorant is required in order to perpetuate the religious and ruling class’ control, power, influence, and luxury because once the people understand the world broadly and no longer live in fear or despair, then the hold that religion has on the populace greatly diminishes. I talk about part of this phenomenon at the very beginning of this post: Systemic Suppression with America’s Two Party SystemThis vicious cycle sort of follows Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs.

Maslow Hierarchy of Needs - 8 Levels
Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs – 8 Levels

As long as their lower order needs (deficiency needs) are NOT met then religion will be prevalent and powerful because the people are ignorant, fearful, hungry, suffering, and without power or influence which is predominant in the countries of the Global South and among the exploited and poverty stricken people around the world, so using religion as a powerful coping strategy becomes useful and prevalent.

Once their lower order needs are met and people are able to truly pursue higher order needs, then religious influence and power wanes which is a powerful trend you are seeing within Europe especially within the Nordic countries (whose populace is the happiest and best educated in the world, and has the lowest level of poverty in the world) where non-believers are the fastest growing (a)religious demographic.

There is a reason why many people become more progressive and non-religious after they go to college. Students in college learn much more about the world and are exposed to many more ideas and people from around the country and from around the world which makes the world seem smaller and less scary. It harder to dehumanize and fear a people you have met or to fear something you understand. This is really why conservatives strike so hard against education. It gets rid of your ignorance and fears so that you are harder to control. Without ignorance, suffering, and fear religions have very little to hold on to in order to maintain control over people. Here are some modern anti-intellectual religious signs to help give you an idea that this mentality is alive and well within conservative religious circles.

With every advancement in science, medicine, and all other disciplines, pulling back one more fold in the veil of Humanity’s vast ignorance, religion loses one more sliver of power and control over the masses and nations. However, conservative religions will not go quietly into the deep abyss of ignorance and fear from whence they spawned. They will go kicking and screaming to try to prevent societal advancement to try to ensure that we all suffer from ignorance, fear, and division so as to be able maintain the control and power that it once had, but more importantly, to keep an iron-clad grasp on the illusion of the perceived truth of their belief system – dogma no matter the cost, which is conveniently similar to capitalism’s motto – profit no matter cost.

Let us look to a modified quote from Yoda from Star Wars: The Phantom Menace which places this cycle in more clear focus. I added the ignorance part which is the true progenitor for this process in his quote:

Ignorance is the path to the dark side:

  1. ignorance leads to fear
  2. fear leads to anger
  3. anger leads to hatred
  4. hatred leads to suffering

It is this process that education looks to help short-circuit by attempting to eliminate ignorance, which greatly reduces the number of people who may fall prey to the predatory and dehumanizing practices of conservative religions and hence world-wide suffering.

7. Absolution of Immoral Acts by an Imaginary Friend

Never trust a person who can clear theri conscience of any immoral act by asking forgiveness from their imaginary friend.
Never trust a person who can clear their conscience of any immoral act by asking forgiveness from their imaginary friend.

There is this interesting meme that summarizes how all of the above comes together:

Never trust a person who can clear their conscience of any immoral act by asking forgiveness from their imaginary friend.

After exploring the subject of morality and religion directly and writing my post Morality vs Religion (Apr 2015), I found the arrogance and hubris of the social requirement of religious belief in order to be a good and moral person patently offensive and morally repugnant, especially in light of the examples laid forth in the previous section.

IV. Religion Within the Humanity of Tomorrow

A. Economic Systems and Religion

My post here may seem like a damning indictment of conservative religions, and you would be right, but this document is much, much more than that. As a powerful and convenient cross-over, this post is also meant as a damning indictment of Capitalism and economic systems. 

Capitalism (as an Entropic system) requires the sociopathic commodification of everything, even human lives in order to create a perpetual stream of profit, no matter the cost to Humanity or the Natural World. Everything and everyone has a price tag for exploitation by those with the money or power to do so.

This completely gives rise to the many horrors which are required in order for Capitalism to flourish:

  • monstrous levels of wealth concentration in so few hands
  • ignorance, fear, the many isms (such as racism sexism, classism),
  • austerity, poverty, and rugged individualism
  • slave labor, child slave labor, unsafe working conditions, little sick time or health care
  • war, slavery, genocide

…all for the powerless peasant class while also inflicting destruction upon the Natural World such as:

  • clear cutting of forests, polluting of the air, rivers, oceans, and the soil
  • over hunting and fishing of the oceans and the land
  • animal cruelty, factory farms, broad wildlife extinctions

…all in order to to maximize short-term profit to ensure that the affluent get richer not only through this exploitation, but also through the government’s socialism for the rich. If you want to know the hows and whys then check out my powerful post: The Cancer of Capitalism and Its Antidote and I will give you an overview there so you can see the cause-effect relationship.

We could even say “Because of the complete lack of moral foundation and conscience that Capitalism requires in order for it to flourish this allows and even requires the existence of religions in order to help Humanity cope with plethora of Capitalism’s predations and horrors. If humanity is truly going evolve beyond and be free from religion and its horrors, then we must first free ourselves from Capitalism and economic systems.

B. A World Beyond Religion?

Religions will always exist and to think we can get rid of them is folly. You cannot outlaw ignorance or fear nor feelings of hopelessness, despair, wonder, or existential curiosity or dread. Religions, as I have shown, at their very base, are about acknowledging and giving name to our ignorances and fears. Unless humanity somehow reaches the point where we know all of the things, then religions shall be with us in one form or another because even if we as a collective species did know all of the things, individuals will not know all of things. I would hate to see the day when Humanity collectively, in its infinite hubris, states that we know everything that there is to know, for that will truly be the eve of the end of human existence.

With that being said, we can work towards a world which does not really need nor desire superstitions or religions, and where those who believe in a religion would be merely a social curiosity. Living beyond religion would be very empowering because each of us would then realize that we should and were able to do something to solve our problems. Not only would we want to help lift each other up, to protect the environment, and to help to solve ALL of our world’s problems because we could, but it would be an ethical imperative to do so. Perhaps a world so advanced where ignorance, fear, hopelessness, despair and suffering essentially no longer exists.

C. Some Steps Towards a World Beyond Religion

We can make Earth a paradise for all of Humanity if we can just shake off the the oppressive and violent shackles of competition, capitalism, economic systems, monetary systems, and its required divisiveness and the dehumanization of our fellow humans. Can we really do this? Yes we can. Humanity can do much, much better.

We have the knowledge.
We have the resources.
We have the technology. 

But, we do not have the will as Humanity has so definitively shown year after year of Humanity’s dark and blood drenched history.

So, how do we get there to a world beyond religion and therefore beyond ignorance, fear, poverty, war, and suffering? I give a general overview in a page on my policy site Evolving Beyond War, Poverty, and Suffering @ Interstellar New Deal.

First, as mentioned above, it will require an ethical and philosophical change – a shift to a human and environmental centered ideology not only in all global religions, but in all global cultures and societies. I have written my policy page: The 8 Philosophical Pillars for Peace in Humanity which lists those basic pillars which are as follows:

  1. Interdependence
  2. Humanity
  3. Natural World
  4. Sustainability
  5. Equity
  6. Justice and Compassion
  7. Education
  8. Science and Technology

Please take the time to read that page which explains each of the Philosophical Pillars and why they are important. These need to form the central foundations of our religions and our global educational systems because they break down all of those walls that divide us and will promote a powerful and interdependent unity with each and every human on Earth as well as with the natural world. These are the foundations of a humanistic based new world.

Some of the next steps, which embody those values, are Universal Basic Services (UBS) which means universal access to:

  • education
  • health care
  • housing
  • food
  • transportation
  • internet

…all of which form the foundations of equity, banishes ignorance, helps to pull people out of poverty, and empowers them to be all they desire to be.

My policy site, Interstellar New Deal, goes over many of those many other policies to help get us there, and that list is really, really big especially in America which is really, really messed up due to the horrors of unrestrained and predatory capitalism.

A great example of countries that are closest to these ideals are the countries with the best standard of living which are in Europe, specifically the Nordic countries. In those countries religion is slowly dying while the fastest growing denomination is non-belief. When a populace:

  • is highly educated because it has free education
  • is healthy because it has free health care
  • is basically free of poverty (~3%)

… and therefore does not have to live in fear, then religion loses its ground and its power; and people no longer need false answers to assuage their fears and to provide hope.

V. Some Interesting Quotes

I am going to leave you with some quotes:

A. Joseph Campbell

The brilliant Joseph Campbell who specialized in mythology and comparative religion:

Mythology may, in a real sense, be defined as other people’s religion. And religion may, in a sense, be understood as popular misunderstanding of mythology.”

Joseph Campbell

Every religion, every mythology is true in this sense: It is true as metaphorical of the human and cosmic mystery.

Joseph Campbell

Every myth is psychologically symbolic. Its narratives and images are to be read, therefore, not literally, but as metaphors.

Joseph Campbell

What gods are there, what gods have there ever been, that were not from man’s imagination?

Joseph Campbell

All religions are true but none are literal.

Joseph Campbell

Every religion is true one way or another. It is true when understood metaphorically. But when it gets stuck in its own metaphors, interpreting them as facts, then you are in trouble.

Joseph Campbell

Half the people in the world think that the metaphors of their religious traditions, for example, are facts. And the other half contends that they are not facts at all. As a result we have people who consider themselves believers because they accept metaphors as facts, and we have others who classify themselves as atheists because they think religious metaphors are lies.

Joseph Campbell

B. H.P. Lovecraft

H.P. Lovecraft is a famous author of horror fiction with his Cthulu mythos.

If religion were true, its followers would not try to bludgeon their young into conformity; but would merely insist on their unbending quest for truth, irrespective of artificial backgrounds or practical consequences.

H.P Lovecraft

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Polyamory, Jealousy, and the Eight Walls of Intimacy

Monday, May 23rd, 2016

Note: This post will be a sort of a part of a 2-part follow-up to my post on Understanding and Managing Jealousy:

If you have not read the other two articles then please take a look.

Jealousy, that horrible Green-Eyed Monster that can tear apart relationships, can rear its ugly head enough in monogamous relationships, but in an open or polyamorous relationships there are a tremendous amount of opportunities where jealousy can surface and cause problems if you are not prepared. The more we understand jealousy the better we will be able to tame this destructive beast. Please also take a look at my other articles on Jealousy to explore this further.

The Eight Walls of Intimacy

I envision there are 8 basic walls (categories of intimacy) that a person may encounter when jealousy, fear, and insecurities can really rear its ugly head. For some of you, depending on where you are at in your journey, these walls can be made of teddy bears and rainbows bringing us joy and candy, but for others, though, a wall can be made of a thousand pounds of tetanus-laden spiked bricks and wounded badgers which rise up to tear you and your loved ones apart.

Each person and each relationship is going to be different, but below are the eight walls I have identified that we may run into when our partners desire intimacy, are intimate, or show intimacy with others. Six of the walls are general categories of actions, and two are specific significant actions whose potential emotional response may be large enough to warrant its own listing. You might arrange them different for you, but I tried to put the walls in the order of least likely to most likely to trigger a jealous reaction. Some specific actions may be categorized differently for you than it is for others, or might be categorized under several of the walls for different reasons, but this should be good enough to start the conversation.

  1. Interest in Another – showing or expressing interest in another person
  2. Non-Sexual Physical Intimacy – holding hands, hugging, kissing, cuddling, petting
  3. Intellectual Intimacy – having deep conversations, sharing a hobby or other interest in common, have aligned philosophical, political, or religious views, etc…
  4. Emotional Intimacy - the way that your partner looks at another, desiring and being excited to see another person, having or desiring a deep emotional connection with another
  5. The “L” Bomb – saying that you love someone else too
  6. Sexual Intimacy – sexual thoughts or having sex with another
  7. Commitment – entangling finances or living conditions, etc; bringing the partner over to family events,
  8. Children – wanting to have children with another, having their children play together, spending time or taking care of the other’s children

Jealousy Severity Rating (JSR)

In the table below I have the 8 Walls listed with a rating scale (0-5) for the Jealousy Severity Rating, and a section for Partner Notes. You could even create subcategories to show that certain aspects are better or worse for you like: non-sexual physical intimacy does not phase you, with the exception of kissing which is something that you may consider very intimate, and seeing your partner kiss another brings out a fresh batch of negative emotions.

Here is a PDF version of this: Jealousy Severity Rating Worksheet

Walls of Intimacy Jealousy Severity Rating (JSR) Partner Notes
0 1 2 3 4 5
1 Interest in Another
2 Non-Sexual Physical Intimacy
3 Intellectual Intimacy
4 Emotional Intimacy
5 The “L” Bomb
6 Sexual Intimacy
7 Commitment
8 Children

Jealousy Severity Rating

JSR name description notes
 0  no reaction no negative emotions are brought up, sunshine and rainbows good for you – compersive feelings are what it is all about
 1 light jealous reaction wibbling, you notice it and may be able to tell it to go away; you may be aware of what is happening and why perhaps some more self reflection is in order and perhaps consider a future talk with your partner about this
 2 mild jealous reaction some negative emotions arise are creating stress and some conflict with you and/or your partners this is a good time to start a conversation with you partner as well as healthy dose of self reflection time
 3 definite jealous reaction definite negative emotions arise: anger, sadness, feelings of loss or neglect and create definite conflict therapist most likely needed, partner conversation needed
 4 strong jealous reaction crying, rabid fears run amok, feeling despondent, questioning relationships and partner choices therapist definitely needed
 5 overwhelming jealousy hysterical crying, serious thoughts of divorce or breaking up, potential thoughts of suicide therapist definitely needed

Exploratory Exercises:

  • assign a Jealousy Severity Rating (JSR) to each Wall with 5 being the most severe reaction
  • create sub-categories or list specific triggers that are significant for you and list their JSR
  • rearrange these in the order from least to most likely to induce an attack of a negative emotion
  • share this with your partners along with notes of their triggers and for ways they can provide reassurance and support to help you combat or deal with it
  • your partners can do these exercises for themselves too
  • each partner can fill this out for how they believe these areas may affect their individual partners as a sort of a check. We may not think a specific or category or trigger affects us, but others may see that it does and this can start a conversation

The Implied Monogamous Relationship Agreement (IMRA)

Monday, May 23rd, 2016

Note: This post will be a sort of a part of a 2-part follow-up to my post on Understanding and Managing Jealousy:

If you have not read the other two articles then please take a look.

Introduction

To get the most out of this article you will have to closely examine your past and present monogamous relationships as well as your thoughts, assumptions, and expectations in relationships to see the truth in what I am presenting. This process may be challenging for some. Keep in mind, also, that this is written in broad and sweeping terms.

This article is written from the stand point of an American in a westernized culture where monogamy is the norm and other relationships are not allowed and/or are punished. The only acceptable or even acknowledged relationship structure here is monogamy.

All relationships have a relationship agreement which governs what actions are acceptable or not – monogamy is no exception, although most do not even know that it exists or that this is a thing. The first rule of monogamy, like the Fight Club, is to not talk about the Implied Monogamous Relationship Agreement (IMRA) or even acknowledge its existence.

The IMRA is something that is ingrained and indoctrinated into us as children. It is a fact of life and no other relationship formations can even be contemplated or considered, because the rules for all relationships are already set in stone for you and they are to be a visceral and intrinsic part of your worldview, understanding of life, and the way you interact with people. Its rules and your acceptance of them is implied and expected by everyone as a matter of course. To violate these rules is to court disaster from society at large.

Our culture supports, enforces, and perpetuates the existence of monogamy and its relationship agreement through books, movies, music, religion, laws, and our societal expectations of relationships. Understanding that the IMRA exists can help us to understand our thoughts, emotions and desires, to manage and understand jealousy better, and to better understand relationships dynamics.

As a note – a lot of this is perpetuated and reinforced by 2 harmful ideas: the Starvation Model of Love and the One True Love Myth. If you have not heard of these then please look them up. Perhaps I will write up a short post on this as well.

Contents of the Implied Monogamous Relationship Agreement

The IMRA manifests as a series of Exclusivity Clauses (EC) which effectively state that your partner will have exclusive access to you in the following major areas of life:

  1. Social
  2. Intellectual
  3. Emotional
  4. Sexual
  5. Financial
  6. Parental

I will talk about the individual EC’s a bit more below. In my forthcoming article that talks about the ‘Eight Walls of Intimacy’ you will see how these EC’s map to the Eight Walls – hint: they map pretty closely. Certain specific life moments may have significant overlap in several areas. Flirting is a good example of this, since it could hit on sexual, social, and intellectual or emotional areas, depending on the person or the situation.

For the following discussions I am going to assume that we are talking about a person who is in some form of a committed monogamous relationship (i.e. married or dating exclusively).

Before we dive in we have to create/define one word here as it will be used for our purposes so I do not have to repeat a large phrase each time:

person-gender:  a person of a gender that is appropriate for you as a potential romantic interest (i.e if you are a heterosexual woman then that gender would be male). This is typically applies to situations outside the work environment, but could apply there – each person, relationship, and situation is different.

Social Exclusivity

Social Exclusivity points to only spending time with your partner and no other person-gender – not for lunch (especially if they are very attractive), not chatting on Facebook, not flirting with, not going to a convention or concert with. Your primary social partner is your exclusive partner in all things not work related and anyone else is infringing in that space.

Intellectual Exclusivity

Intellectual Exclusivity points to not finding other person-gender interesting or having interests in common (and wanting to share it with them) especially if your partner does not share it in common with you; not having deep conversations about life, politics, religion, or philosophy, etc.

Emotional Exclusivity

Emotional Exclusivity points to only having romantic or other feelings of desire for your partner and no other person-gender – not still caring for your ex’s or even still carrying a flame for them or a previous love, not falling in love with or being attracted to someone else, not having a close friendship that is closer than an acquaintance or distant friend.

Sexual Exclusivity

Sexual Exclusivity points to having sex with and only sexual thoughts for your partner and not finding other person-gender attractive or thinking about them sexually, not looking at porn, not admitting that they are pretty or are in great shape, not pointing out great things about them, since you should have eyes for only your partner.

Financial Exclusivity

Financial exclusivity points to not spending money on other person-gender – not gifts, surprise parties, trips, etc. All money should be spent only on your partner.

Parental Exclusivity

Parental Exclusivity points to only wanting to have children with your partner, not thinking about wanting kids with partner-gender or what your children might look like. Obviously, there are some exceptions when you already have kids with someone else, but the other rules still basically apply to them too.

Morality without Religion?

Friday, April 17th, 2015

I was fortunate enough to be able to participate in a single session of a class held at our congregation (The Free Congregation of Sauk County) where this question was asked by Nick Schweitzer, the class’ facilitator:

18. When someone asks you how an atheist can be moral, what do you think the underlying question is? (E.g., is he/she asking how you can know what morality is if you don’t believe in God’s rules, or how people can be trusted to behave decently if they’re not afraid of damnation, or how people can be motivated to behave decently if they don’t believe in an eternal reward, etc.?)

What is your answer to the question?

Below is my answer as far as I can articulate in a short time (a partial day’s worth of work). It is bit disjointed and not as well research or worded as my other writings, but this is all I could manage for now:

The Real Question

So, they ask you “How can an Atheist be moral?”. What do you think the underlying question is?  Well, the underlying question they are asking from their limited context really is:

“How can a person who does not believe in:

  • the authority of the Christian God as the sole source of good, and ethics, and morality
  • their interpretation of their version of their sacred text
  • heaven and hell (and, by extension, damnation and salvation)

..still  have a moral system, especially when, in their world view, where the source of morality and good emanates from a reward and punishment system that is a visceral part of their world-view and  moral system, and this “atheist” has the temerity to reject it?”

Unfortunately, it is natural for someone with this limited world-view to ask such a question, and it is seriously asked by those of  conservative denominations, for obvious reasons. Hopefully, some will find my thoughts and considerations below interesting or enlightening.

Evaluating Conservative Psychology and Religion

Now, there are a lot of problems with this question especially when a lot of the impetus for the question is founded in the limited conservative religious world view, and there is a lot to consider and the take into account when trying to understand it. Keep in mind, that all of this below is just my opinion, and it is based on only that which I know, which is not everything, unfortunately. =(

Conservative Psychology

First we will want to take a look at the psychology that underlies conservatives that will help us understand the impetus and phrasing of the question from their mindset. For that we will travel to Moral Psychology land as well as visit Negativity Bias and Other Psychological Factor‘s land:

Moral Psychology

To understand where this question comes from and what they are really asking we really need to delve, at least a little bit, into moral psychology, which can be quite enlightening in subjects such as this. Jonathan Haidt, a famous moral psychologist, and those in his field have distilled the basic moral components that we all have as the basis for morality, and this is even shown in other animals to some extent, as the following:

  • Harm/Care
  • Fairness/Reciprocity
  • In group Loyalty (Tribalism)
  • Authority/Respect
  • Purity/Sanctity

Liberals score high on:

  • Harm/Care
  • Fairness and Reciprocity

Conservatives score high on the other three:

  • In group Loyalty (Tribalism)
  • Authority/Respect
  • Purity/Sanctity

Now, this can already show why and how conservatives see things and approach morality differently than liberals, at least according to moral psychology. Essentially, conservatives respond to authority (religion and authority figures), tribalism (groups like themselves), Purity/Sanctity (religion) regardless of how it affects others, whereas liberals respond to fairness and taking care of others regardless of the affect on the established institutions. This alone is pretty telling especially when you compare this to liberal and conservative religious and political rhetoric and ideologies.

If we apply the above moral psychology principles to our “question” it may look like this:

“You are not apart of our group, and you do not respect the authority of our group and its institutions and beliefs, then how can you be a good person, since we obviously are good?”

Negativity Bias and Other Conservative Psychological Factors

A recent study has come out that shows that conservatives have a “negativity bias,” meaning that they are physiologically more attuned to negative (threatening, disgusting) stimuli in their environments, even to the point of seeking it out or “seeing” threats in places and people, especially when differ from themselves.

Other studies suggest that conservatives are characterized by traits such as a need for certainty and an intolerance of ambiguity, of which conservative organizations are more than happy to help with. They provide a clear and clean “this is right and this is wrong, and these are our enemies”.

With this being said, this research sort of shows a conservative person as being prone to seeing threats from that which is different than themselves and their beliefs, and even likes to hear those that espouse that there are threats even if there aren’t any, and is bound to see that which is different as a potential “threat”, especially since they do not believe the same, which in some ways feeds into conservative talk radio, and racism, and other forms of rallying against those who are not like themselves regardless of the consequences to those who are different than them.

Conservative Religion as it Caters to Conservative Psychology

So if we combine the psychological factors discussed above into one thing we get a person who:

  • Prefers their group (tribalism)
  • Respects authority, especially within their group
  • Seeks out and prefers to hear those say what the threats are against them, especially when it includes those who are different than them (not a part of their tribal group)
  • Requires certainty and has an intolerance toward ambiguity

Once we have this picture and we add in the influence of, or as a byproduct, resulting in the creation of conservative religion things come into focus very clearly. Conservative religion provides a clear membership identification and is more than happy to tell you who is good and who is bad which caters to adding certainty and removing intolerance to ambiguity, as well as providing authority, a tribal group, and an authority that they can respect. A massive confluence of all of the things that conservative psychology enjoys and thrives under.

Another benefit of conservative religion is that they will have no one to hold them accountable for their interpretation of their sacred texts and their resultant actions when they can say that their interpretation of their religious scripture says they are correct. When they all get together and say ‘yes’ we believe this (even though they may be wrong), their divine entity will not come down and  slap them silly for being stoopid in the head. They get the benefit of defining their version of their religion and their version of their divine entity that caters to their psychological needs and no one can say, in any certainty, that they are right or wrong, even thought they are obviously from a moral and ethical standpoint. It becomes an battle of “our interpretation” vs “your interpretation” which would never sway a conservative since they have a strong respect for their tribal authority (their own) no matter what the consequence to others is. They feel a they have the righteous belief and will not brook any question of the truth of their interpretation or actions since it will bring about dissonance and ambiguity, and jeopardize their belief in their authority figure.

A part of the conservative religious world view is inherently laden with fear, temptation, damnation and sin, original sin, and demons all of which cater to their negativity bias, and, of course, which can also have adverse psychological affects on those who partake of this way of thinking for a long period of time resulting in a life filled with fear, anxiety, and feelings of less-worth. The resultant negative and fearful view towards the world, humanity, and, unfortunately, themselves too inherent in the conservative religious world view is a natural part of their view when around all corners is temptation and demons, fear and anxiety are a natural thing to have.  Now, the convenient part of this is that they invest their trust in the authority of ‘their church’ which propagates these negative emotions and beliefs and it, therefore, becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy. When the church says people are bad and inherently sinful and then they seek the church for guidance due to their bias towards their own tribal authority, and their negativity bias which results their own self-inflicted reduction in self-worth, then all good becomes because of their tribe membership and all bad comes from outside of the tribe, since that is what is bad because it is different. To believe otherwise is to invite dissonance and ambiguity which is not allowed in their minds, or by their authoritarian structures. Conservative psychology, by extension, has a self-vested interest in maintaining tribal exceptionalism and the convenience of inerrant scriptural interpretation of their sacred text, since it all feeds into creating certainty (even thought it may not be correct) which provides the benefit of removing ambiguity and promoting their belief in their tribe and its authority, without which will come uncertainty and dissonance.

Revisiting the “Real Question”

From above we said the following:

“How can a person who does not believe in:

  •  the authority of the Christian God as the sole source of good, and ethics, and morality
  • their interpretation of their version of their sacred text
  • heaven and hell (and, by extension, damnation and salvation)

..still  have a moral system, especially when, in their world view, where the source of morality and good emanates from a reward and punishment system that is a visceral part of their world-view and  moral system, and this “atheist” has the temerity to reject it?”

… and that a summary of conservative psychology is:

  • Prefers their group (tribalism)
  • Respects authority, especially within their group
  • Seeks out and prefers to hear those say what the threats are against them, especially when it includes those who are different than them (not a part of their tribal group)
  • do not like certainty and an intolerance of ambiguity

Let us apply the conservative psychological factors to the question so we can understand where they are coming from. This questions calls into question the non-believer’s nontribal membership, caters to their negativity bias and their bias towards authority. Their authority structure has already branded this person as bad and therefore uncertainty has been removed as well, and therefore the unbeliever is bad, so this question really is formed and is reinforced by their psychological world view as described above.

The Liberal Answer

In some ways I have covered a lot of my answer in my previous blog posts from a few years ago, but I will reform my ideas briefly here within context of this question. Of course, most of what I have to say will not convince a conservative since it does not key on their conservative psychological factors and keys on factors outside of their world view, a lot of which challenges their belief structures which is much of why they deny science since it is a considerable threat to what their authoritarian structure teaches, and also imposes external authority structures which invites dissonance and ambiguity, which they do not like.

Limiting one’s perception of the world and decision making to that which their religious tribe says is OK results in a severely limited world view, especially if they are willing to eschew other other authority structures which conflict with their primary and self-assured source of eternal authority. This view lacks an open and informed context of the world (eschewing science, history, empathy and sympathy), especially when their religious world view is limited to a 2000 year old text (at least as far as the New testament is concerned, if we are being generous, or over 5000 years old text if we take into account the Old Testament) that was founded in a culture, history, and context of which we do not share, especially when homosapien is at least 100,000 thousand years old, therefore the most powerful religious denomination in the west has only been around for 5% of human history. An incredible amount has changed in our society due to science and social sciences in the last 100 years, let alone the last 1000 years, and unfortunately conservative religion does not move at the speed of social or scientific progress. The thought of a changing conservative religion is abhorrent to conservatives for many reasons as you could see from up above, although they eventually do change when they are not able to fight against it anymore, or to do so would threaten their existence. This lack of change is due to a threat to the perceived stable and eternal authorith of their belifs which they do not like so they fight it tooth and nail to maintain their beliefs and authority regardless of who is hurt in the process. Sure there is wisdom to be had in their sacred texts, but it must be measured with contemporary social and scientific advances and not be anchored in an ancient world that no longer exists, especially when the beliefs result in harms to other people, the environement, or other creatures.

Singular Mythological or Religious Authority or Something Else?

Let us take a look at the fact that there are over 5000 religions that humanity has utilized over the its short lifespan, and most have many things in common – their laws and ideals at their base teach us good from bad, which is a powerful underpinning found in every religion and society through the history of humanity’s short existence . This alone is a powerful concept which points to something even larger going on that is not limited to one any one religion. A keen example of this is the Golden Rule. The following of the existence of the Golden Rule in many religions is overkill, but it will really help to strongly reinforce this idea that no one religion has corners the market of moral truths:

Bahá’í Faith:

  • “Ascribe not to any soul that which thou wouldst not have ascribed to thee, and say not that which thou doest not.” “Blessed is he who preferreth his brother before himself.” Baha’u’llah
  • “And if thine eyes be turned towards justice, choose thou for thy neighbour that which thou choosest for thyself.” Epistle to the Son of the Wolf. 1

Brahmanism:

  • “This is the sum of Dharma [duty]: Do naught unto others which would cause you pain if done to you”. Mahabharata, 5:1517 “

Buddhism:

  • “…a state that is not pleasing or delightful to me, how could I inflict that upon another?” Samyutta NIkaya v. 353
  • “Hurt not others in ways that you yourself would find hurtful.” Udana-Varga 5:18

Christianity:

  • “Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.” Matthew 7:12, King James Version.
  • “And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise.” Luke 6:31, King James Version.
  • “…and don’t do what you hate…”, Gospel of Thomas 6. The Gospel of Thomas is one of about 40 gospels that circulated among the early Christian movement, but which never made it into the Christian Scriptures (New Testament).

Confucianism:

  • “Do not do to others what you do not want them to do to you” Analects 15:23
  • “Tse-kung asked, ‘Is there one word that can serve as a principle of conduct for life?’ Confucius replied, ‘It is the word ‘shu’ — reciprocity. Do not impose on others what you yourself do not desire.'” Doctrine of the Mean 13.3
  • “Try your best to treat others as you would wish to be treated yourself, and you will find that this is the shortest way to benevolence.” Mencius VII.A.4

Ancient Egyptian:

  • “Do for one who may do for you, that you may cause him thus to do.” The Tale of the Eloquent Peasant, 109 – 110 Translated by R.B. Parkinson. The original dates to circa 1800 BCE and may be the earliest version of the Epic of Reciprocity ever written. 2

Hinduism:

  • This is the sum of duty: do not do to others what would cause pain if done to you. Mahabharata 5:1517

Islam:

  • “None of you [truly] believes until he wishes for his brother what he wishes for himself.” Number 13 of Imam “Al-Nawawi’s Forty Hadiths.” 3

Jainism:

  • “Therefore, neither does he [a sage] cause violence to others nor does he make others do so.” Acarangasutra 5.101-2.
  • “In happiness and suffering, in joy and grief, we should regard all creatures as we regard our own self.” Lord Mahavira, 24th Tirthankara
  • “A man should wander about treating all creatures as he himself would be treated. “Sutrakritanga 1.11.33

Judaism:

  • “…thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.”, Leviticus 19:18
  • “What is hateful to you, do not to your fellow man. This is the law: all the rest is commentary.” Talmud, Shabbat 31a.
  • “And what you hate, do not do to any one.” Tobit 4:15 4

Taoism:

  • ““Regard your neighbor’s gain as your gain, and your neighbor’s loss as your own loss.” Tai Shang Kan Yin P’ien
  • “To those who are good to me, I am good; to those who are not good to me, I am also good. Thus all get to be good.”

Zoroastrianism:

  • “That nature alone is good which refrains from doing to another        whatsoever is not good for itself.” Dadisten-I-dinik, 94,5
  • “Whatever is disagreeable to yourself do not do unto others.” Shayast-na-Shayast 13:29 5

Perhaps you may might state “Well, God has existed before all time and that is where humans get good and evil and motality, so what you are saying is not true. How ’bout them apples, Mr Smartypants? “.

Well, that could easily be claimed by every single religion ever created, therefore such answers are NOT valid. This becomes especially poignant since almost all religions have a creation mythology, and Christianity is no different. You will also find that the mythological stories in the Christian narrative have parallels in the other religions that have come before it and from which its stories draw. The Christian narrative is merely the byproduct of the religions that have come before it as pulled together by the cultural, religious, and political needs and context of the people who created it, as all religion that have ever existed have. Christianity is, in no way, more special than any other religion that has ever existed. It is merely just one of the many religious views that humanity will have throughout its existence, hopefully long existence, assuming our planet does not destroy us first for our hubris.  =)

Evolutionary and Moral Pscychology as Human’s Source For Morality

Naturally evolutionary psychology and moral psychology tends to show us that morality is an integral part of who we are as humans, independent of any particular religion, since we evolved as social creatures as an evolutionary survival adaptation. Those who work together tend to survive longer, but not only that, those who treat others well, tend to survive longer since it breeds greater tribal loyalty, cooperation, and cohesion. Morality is not a thing powered by the gods, it is powered by our evolutionary instincts for survival, without which humans would never have survived long enough to have a need to create its mulitifarious religions, especially in its contemporary forms . I have written that the fundamental essence of all religions is humanism draped in cultural, social, political, and theological trappings of their time. It is a means of passing on moral and human values in a form that is more acceptable to their specific historical and cultural audience. I also venture to say that religions will only survive in the far future if they embrace a humanism as its core, especially as humanity becomes more and more advanced and liberal by extension. Erasmus of Rotterdam was a Catholic priest from the 1500’s who saw a great need within the church and promoted Christian Humanism, and is the contemporary father of this movement.

I may even venture to say that it is easier for liberals to live moral lives without religion since the things that trigger them as identified by moral psychology:

  • Harm/Care
  • Fairness and Reciprocity

… inherently bring about higher chances of devloping a morally good person or society, whereas it may be more difficult for conservatives to do so since they have a strong negativity bias, dislike for ambiguity, and repond to authoritarian structures regardless of how it affects others.

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My Related Personal Blog Posts

“Choose to Bless the World” by Rebecca Parker of Starr King UU Seminary

Sunday, May 18th, 2014

This is a wonderful poem that I heard read at our congregation at the Free Congregation of Sauk County, and it touched me enough to post it. It is written by Rebecca Parker, a Methodist/Unitarian Universalist minister, who attended famous UU seminary the Starr King Seminary.

Choose to Bless the World by Rebecca Parker

Your gifts—whatever you discover them to be—

can be used to bless or curse the world

The mind’s power,
The strength of the hands,
The reaches of the heart,
The gift of speaking, listening, imagining, seeing, waiting

Any of these can serve to feed the hungry,
Bind up wounds,
Welcome the stranger,
Praise what is sacred,
Do the work of justice
Or offer love.

Any of these can draw down the prison door,
Hoard bread,
Abandon the poor,

Obscure what is holy,
Comply with injustice
Or withhold love.

You must answer this question:
What will you do with your gifts?

Choose to bless the world.

The choice to bless the world is more than an act of will,
A moving forward into the world
With the Intention to do good.
It is an act of recognition, a confession of surprise, a grateful acknowledgment
That in the midst of a broken world
Unspeakable beauty, grace and mystery abide.

There is an embrace of kindness that encompasses all life, even yours.

And while there is injustice, anesthetization, or evil
There moves
A holy disturbance,
A benevolent rage,
A revolutionary love,
Protesting, urging, insisting
That which is sacred will not be defiled.

Those who bless the world live their life as a gesture of thanks
For this beauty
And this rage.

The choice to bless the world can take you into solitude
To search for the sources of power and grace;
Native wisdom, healing, and liberation.

More, the choice will draw you into community,
The endeavor shared,
The heritage passed on,
The companionship of struggle,
The importance of keeping faith,
The life of ritual and praise,
The comfort of human friendship,
The company of earth
The chorus of life welcoming you.

None of us alone can save the world.

Together—that is another possibility waiting.

Rebecca Parker

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The Apology: The Church could start by asking for forgiveness.

Monday, May 20th, 2013

The following article titled ‘The Apology’ is pulled directly from Dr. Stewart Edser’s Website ‘Being Gay, drugs
Being Christian’. I felt compelled to reproduce his wonderful article for posterity, if, for some reason, his should go off-line. Please do not read it here. Click on over to his site Being Gay, Being Christian

The Apology

Here is the apology that the Christian Church needs to offer the gay people of the world. It doesn’t seem to be forthcoming at the moment from the Church, so I have penned one myself on the Church’s behalf to give it an idea of how this might go. To give credit, there are some in the Church who do feel this way, but still not enough. So share it with your Christian friends. Share it with your pastor, your priest, share it with your bishop. The church needs to change its view of gay people and its treatment of gay people. We too are part of God’s incredible human family.

The Church could start by asking for forgiveness. It could start with an apology.

To Gay People the World Over

We the Christian Church, while professing that our reason for existence is to spread the knowledge of God in the manner of Jesus of Nazareth and to show God’s love and compassion for all humanity by our lives, with Jesus as our exemplar, most especially to the down-trodden, the weary, the sick, the old, the widow, the orphan, the prisoner, the weak, the oppressed, the poor and the marginalised, acknowledge that we have fallen so far short in our attitudes toward and our treatment of one marginalised group – gay people – that our actions can only be described as sin. And sin of the gravest kind. We have called that which God has created good, evil. We have contaminated the worth of your lives with toxic shame and presented you to the world as reprehensible and filthy, as the epitome of moral repugnance.

We know that one of the earliest words in the Scriptures for sin was an archery term, the Greek word hamartia (ἁμαρτία) describing an arrow ‘missing its mark.’ As the Church of Jesus Christ, we freely acknowledge that we have completely missed the mark regarding gay people from the very beginning and that two thousand years of history has not seen us grow any more enlightened. To this very day, we continue to judge you, deny you, reject you, pillory you, vilify you, denigrate you, condemn you, besmirch you, denounce you and exclude you and we do this for one reason and one reason only – your sexual orientation.

We do humbly and abjectly apologise for our actions. We acknowledge our mistreatment of you. We ask for your forgiveness even though we know we do not deserve it.

We own this great transgression of Jesus’ first and only commandment of love. We have been anything but loving. We have been the antithesis of loving. We have been an organ of hate.

For these sins we are truly sorry.

We have clung to out-dated interpretations of Biblical passages. We have refused to openly explore modern scholarship that brings to light so much about the Bible, Jesus and his teachings that we never knew before. We have been openly belligerent towards you and have acted in pride as we shot you down in flames and pronounced judgment over your lives as an abomination. We have behaved towards you in dialogue from a place of hubris where we haughtily saw ourselves as the saved and you as sinners. We have ignored your feelings as if they did not matter; that only our precious pronouncements mattered.

For these sins we are truly sorry.

We have told the world that your life is not natural, that you are set against nature and in so doing, you are set against God. We have told the world that you are sick and disordered and sinful, that you are deviant and that your love is not real but is only lust. And we have told the world that lust is evil. We have told the world that your whole lives are ‘inclined to moral evil,’ a statement so grandiose in its language and so all-encompassing in its reach that you gay people are left reeling because such language is usually reserved for despots and tyrants, the cruellest of the cruel.

For these sins we are truly sorry.

We have pitted parents against their gay children. We have caused untold damage in families. We have stopped you from ministering in our churches. We have sacked and dismissed you from legitimate posts because of your sexual orientation. We have impeded your promotion and even put up barriers for your housing. We have refused the communion service to you. We have forbidden you to remain in our fellowships because of your lives. We have persisted in calling your life a ‘lifestyle’ and your orientation a ‘preference,’ knowing full well that those words are not only illegitimate but are also heavily loaded emotionally and politically.

For these sins we are truly sorry.

We have ignored the wisdom of science. We have refused to acknowledge that you are born gay. We stubbornly declare to the world that your ‘sexual preference is a choice,’ despite knowing the fact that science has been able to show definitively that there is a substantial genetic component determining all human sexuality. But we haven’t cared about that. That does not fit our ancient world or mediaeval worldview, so we just ignore the research and dismiss it out of hand, acting as though it does not exist. And we continue to trot out our worn-out arguments and pronouncements with divine certitude while we argue with one another as to which of us has faith the most right. And while we’re busy arguing among ourselves, we trample you underfoot with carefree abandon as we pour out rejection and judgmentalism from our bile-filled mouths.

For these sins we are truly sorry.

We set up our own idols. Men usually. We follow their every pronouncement and treat them as celebrities. Hatemongers who are either ignorant, prejudiced or have some personal axe to grind about sexuality. But also the Church. We construct its systems as though they are set up by God and use the weapon of bureaucracy against you. The Bible. Some of us worship the book instead of seeing it as a pointer to the One.

Idolatry. Ecclesiolatry. Bibliolatry. We listen to homophobes and misanthropists and share their words while we worship a book instead of the God that it speaks of. And we hide behind church governance instead of relating to you as fellow human beings. And from our book and from our churches and from our God, we exclude you. We other you like we have othered no other group in history. We have resolutely painted the picture as us and them. We have done this for centuries. We are the us. And you are the them.

For these sins we are truly sorry.

We have even told you that you had to change, even though we know in our heart of hearts that there is no change. We have set up ministries to lie to you to tell you that your lives are worthless as they are. You must change, that you are not good enough as you are. You must turn yourselves into heterosexual people. Against all evidence, we have told you that you can do this by the power of God and with our support. We did not tell you that should you succumb to our ministrations you would forever be in limbo, a no-man’s land where you will never be straight and you cannot call yourselves gay. And even if you do marry an opposite sex partner and even have children, we will still never quite accept you. We do never quite go the full distance to full acceptance. We have ignored the signs from around the world after some of you have committed suicide because you couldn’t cope with what we did to you in these ministries. However despite the deaths, we have continued on, referring young vulnerable gay people, mostly brought up in the church and in Christian families, to these ministries at a time when they are emotionally defenceless and the power differential between them and us is gargantuan. We have harmed you. We have killed you. We are responsible.

For these sins we are truly sorry.

In our realisation of the grotesque distortion of the Christian Gospel that we have offered the world, a distortion that the world rightly rejects, we abjectly apologise to you. We have debased the Good News and driven people away from God and from life in the Spirit. We have put before the world a false dichotomy between the sacred and the profane and we have put sex and desire in the profane. It is no wonder we have rejected you for you have had to go on a spiritual and emotional journey to be able to accept yourselves at the sexual level. We are frightened of this. We are frightened of sex, of desire. We always have been. We fear you and your comfort with sexuality. We have placed celibacy as the zenith of human conditions and even mandated some of our clergy to live this way against all inclination for the rest of their lives. And we tell young gay people that they too must be celibate and deny an integral part of their identity for the rest of their lives too.

For these sins we are truly sorry.

We are mortally and grievously at fault here. Like the old Latin words we say contritely, ‘mea cupla, mea cupla, mea maxima culpa – through my fault, through my fault, through my most grievous fault.’ We are stripped and laid bare and our transgressions are unveiled for all to see.

Our sins have been grievous and manifold. We have not acted like Jesus at all. We have not shown love or compassion. We have been quick to occupy the divine judgment seat and speak with hubris as if the plank in our own eye were not big enough already.

In apologising and asking for the forgiveness we do not deserve after perpetrating so much hurt and so much harm, we seek to redress our sinful actions. We need to make recompense. We need to change.

We will be the followers of Jesus we were always meant to be. We will have love and charity as our foremost test of everything we do and everything we say. We will seek out and ask for your views and value your opinions. We will include you in our liturgies and as part of our clergy. We will happily employ you. We will desist from calling you unclean, disordered and evil. We will abandon such language forever. We will stop using the Bible as a weapon against you and start reading the scriptures in the light of modern scholarship. We will be big enough and strong enough in our faith in God to say where we think the peoples of the ancient Biblical world got it wrong, such as with slavery, women, the death penalty, and gay people, among other issues. We will have a strong and robust faith that is partnered with reason so that our God and our faith are not mocked and laughed to scorn by an educated, literate, post-enlightenment humanity. We will speak out for equality for all human beings and denounce homophobia specifically. We will be strong advocates for gay people so that you feel welcome, valued and loved as part of the family of God.

We will do our best to make up for the centuries of trauma. We do not know how long it will take for you to trust us and to forgive us. But we openly and honestly offer you our sorrow, our contrition, our apology for our actions past and present.

For these and all our sins against you we are truly sorry.

Pax et Amor – Stuart

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The Gay Debate: The Bible and Homosexuality [video]

Tuesday, August 28th, 2012

This is sad but true. The Tea Part has no real grasp on what America really is or who our founders really are. They claim to be Christians and hide behind claims of righteousness, but violate Jesus’ words at every turn. Hypocrisy and fundamentalism at it worst.

Matthew Vines speaks on the theological debate regarding the Bible and the role of gay Christians in the church. Delivered at College Hill United Methodist Church in Wichita, Kansas on March 8,
2012.

Rachel Maddow Interviewing David Bahati, the Sponsor of the “Killl the Gays” Bill in Uganda

Tuesday, December 14th, 2010

As a follow up to my previous post on this topic titled “Ugandas Death Dentence Legislation for LGBT Peoples and the ‘Christians’ Who Counseled Them Towards This End ” – I just recently found this link from WATCH: RACHEL MADDOW INTERVIEWS UGANDAN MP DAVID BAHATI, AUTHOR OF THE ‘KILL THE GAYS’ BILL. It is actually is disturbing to know that this sort of blind zealotry still exists. I do really know that it does, but it really saddens me to hear of it.  Please take the moment to watch it. Something interesting to note is that I do not think that this interview would have happened if MR. Bahati knew that Rachel Maddow was a lesbian.

Interview with David Bahati – Part 1

Interview with David Bahati – Part 2

Interview with David Bahati – Part 3

Prop 8 Appeal to be Televised

Monday, December 6th, 2010

If you have not followed California’s Prop 8 trial please take the moment to watch the district court appeal which should give you an ideal and a great summary as to what this is all about and both sides’ views. One of the places it is available is via C-SPAN and it all starts at noon (CST). There is also a live BLogging of the district court appeal available at Prop 8 Trial Tracker in case you cannot watch the video at work… like me.

Please watch/read it. This really matters.

The “It Gets Better” Project – a Message to LGBT Children

Monday, November 15th, 2010

Here is the “It Gets Better Project” and other associated It Gets Better videos on You Tube to which Obama, Jewel, Chris Colfer from the Glee cast, Prince Poppycock from America’s Got Talent, Zachary Quinto from Heroes and the New Star Trek movie, and many, many more participate to show their support for gay children who are suffering and may potentially commit suicide due to ignorance,  intolerance, and bullying.

Also, Cindy McCain and some Hollywood friends create An Anti-Bullying Message From the NOH8 Campaign.

Our children need to know that they are loved and that bullies are not the norm, or even right for that fact. The rest of the world, especially once you get out of high school, is not necessarily filled with ignorant assholes. Shocking and hard to believe, I know, but there you go. Please watch these and spread the word, for this is a really important topic.

AFER Video Collage Covering the Journey Towards Overturning California’s Proposition 8

Friday, November 5th, 2010

The American Foundation for Equal Rights (AFER) published a video collage covering the journey Towards overturning California’s Proposition 8. Please watch it.

The Fundamental Essence of Religion is Humanism

Monday, October 11th, 2010

In a previous post about Biblical/Theological Humanism that I had written a while back  titled “Theological Humanism? A solution to the divide?” I mention that religions need to start approaching their theology from a more humanistic perspective otherwise they will, at some point, find themselves irrelevant and ignored, but my primary focus was the fundamentalist and orthodox ideologies and their methodologies and rhetoric. These religions find their dogma more important than the people and that was really my primary focus for that post.  Now, having recently read the following two books, which were awesome by the way,  :

I find my approach towards Theological Humanism solidified, but changing in a very fundamental way to which not everyone will like, and some may label it as heresy.  For that I apologize, but for me this makes a lot of sense. After reading these two books  I was  inspired to write my Personal Creed v1.0 which helps to codify my current beliefs and will also help you to see where I am going with this. In there my first 3 points are as follows:

  1. I hold that the world’s religions have organically developed and evolved based on the political values and socio-cultural conditions of their times. Religion is a method of perpetuating cultural history, mythology, and morality as has been determined by their relative and distinct histories.
  2. I hold that there are many parallels between the world’s religions’ morality that when distilled down to its essence they reflect humanism at its core. Religion and Humanism is about humans and the relations between us as individuals, and humanity as a collective and interdependent society.
  3. I hold that the potential wisdom from the world’s religions can inspire us in our ethical and spiritual life, and provide an impetus for the free and responsible search for truth and meaning. I also hold and accept that each individual’s journey towards spiritual growth is personal and unique, and worthy of respect, inquiry; as well as being a potential place where I may learn and grow in my own journey.

In essence I am saying that the fundamental essence of all religions is humanism which just happens to be steeped in the culture, mythology, politics, and history in which it was formed; in other words at its very essence  all religions teachings and their morality is truly Humanism with a cultural, mythological, political and ideological skewing and dressing them.

With this knowledge choosing the religion that is appropriate for you becomes which flavor of mythology, ideology, and culture do you like your humanism. The ideological, cultural, and mythological choice you make will become defining of how much of what I shall call truth will be taught. The more orthodox or fundamentalist the religion the less truth you will get, since they care more about slavish adherence to their dogma than they do how what they say and do affects humans.

Now some religions really find themselves skewed far from this precept and they emphasize their mythology and dogmas more than they do the moral and humanistic values and this is why the orthodox and fundamentalist religions are harmful. They have forgotten what religion is really all about….. you and me – humans and our relations with one another. Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, and all other prophets’ teachings at their very essences were about us, humans, and our interdependent relations, although some may approach it from an theistic point of view. Religions need to return to the humanistic essence of their theology.

My stance changed from ‘orthodox and fundamentalist religions need to change their approach to their theology’ to ‘they need to return to the humanistic roots of their theology’. A subtle but very important difference. Just an idea for you to ponder. =)

Personal Creed – v1.0

Tuesday, October 5th, 2010

I know not everyone will agree with my beliefs or find this suitable for them, but I have been, as of the last 4+ or so years, engaged in a lot of reading and reflection on religion and science and so on to try and figure out where I stand. The following is  a work in progress and is the current culmination a personal creed for me:

  1. I hold that the world’s religions have organically developed and evolved based on the political values and sociocultural conditions of their times. Religion is a method of perpetuating cultural history, mythology, and morality as has been determined by their relative and distinct histories.
  2. I hold that there are many parallels between the world’s religions’ morality that when distilled down to its essence they reflect humanism at its core. Religion and Humanism is about humans and the relations between us as individuals, and humanity as a collective and interdependent society.
  3. I hold that the potential wisdom from the world’s religions can inspire us in our ethical and spiritual life, and provide an impetus for the free and responsible search for truth and meaning. I also hold and accept that each individual’s journey towards spiritual growth is personal and unique, and worthy of respect, inquiry; as well as being a potential place where I may learn and grow in my own journey.
  4. I hold that I should neither accept nor reject ideas proposed as truth without recourse to knowledge, reason, ethics, and justice. I shall build my opinions and knowledge of the world on the basis of facts, scientific inquiry, and logical principles, independent of the intellectually limiting effects of authority, conventional wisdom, popular culture, sectarianism, tradition, urban legends, and all other dogmatic principles.
  5. I hold the interdependent web of humanity of which we are ALL a part of imbues all humans with inherent worth and are all deserving of life, dignity, right of conscience, justice, equality, compassion, and a pursuit of happiness. This interdependence of humanity with itself necessitates a noble goal of the world community to work towards peace, unity, liberty, equality and justice for all.
  6. I hold that the interdependent web of ALL existence implores finding a balance and innate understanding for the nature’s laws and how we impact it is vitally important so we can maintain an ecological balance and preservation to prevent damage and promote flourishing plants and animals on earth and where ever we migrate to as a species.
  7. Universal Declaration of Human Rights

Informed Resources

There are many books and articles that have really affected and informed my beliefs. Some are as follows and this is not at all an inclusive list:

Books from Amazon

Other Important Sources

Review “Sex at Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality” – A+++

Wednesday, August 18th, 2010

I recently finished the book Sex at Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality. It is an excellent and life altering book. It really ties together a lot of what I have read about evolutionary psychology and evolutionary biology. If you have not read this book, or even if you have never read an evolutionary psychology book at all, read it. It may change the way that you see the world, and I mean that in a good way. It covers topics such as monogamy, swinging, infidelity, and polyamory in it.  It truly covers the wide spectrum of human sexuality. Wow is all I can say.

If you do not know what polyamory is I have written a primer on polyamory for those who are curious.

9th Circuit STAYS Judge Walker’s Ruling Pending an Expedited Appeal

Tuesday, August 17th, 2010

California’s Appellate Court granted a stay on Judge Vaughn’s ruling pending appeal. This was, in my opinion, to be expected since this is such a high profile case and precedent setting case,  so nothing drastic there. However, there is some good news as far as this process is concerned as is covered here BREAKING: 9th Circuit STAYS Judge Walker’s ruling; Appeal scheduled December 6 on Prop 8 Trial Tracker:

  • the appellate court is expediting the the appeal of the ruling of the unconstitutionality of Prop 8 and set the date for the week of 6 December, which is awesome. The sooner the, hopefully, better.
  • they are also specifically asking the Prop8’ers: In addition to any issues appellants wish to raise on appeal, appellants are directed to include in their opening brief a discussion of why this appeal should not be dismissed for lack of Article III standing. which is huge. Judge Vaughn said that they do not have standing for a stay or appeal, if I remember correctly, and the appellate court obviously pretty much agrees with them, but are giving them a chance to sound at least a little rational and try to retain some self respect.

In the scheme of things this is pretty huge. The appeal process could end up being pretty short (comparatively speaking) since they do not have standing for appeal, so this may most likely get dismissed with prejudice, which would prevent a Supreme Court Appeal. This will be a massively huge win and precedent for gay rights all throughout the US if this does happen, since there will be a court ruling stating that banning gay marriage is unconstitutional and they have no standing.

If  the Supreme Court does not dismiss out of hand due to lack of standing, which would rock, then the appellate court’s decision will be appealed to the Supreme Court.

Cross your fingers everyone. History and justice is happening. =)